i can never find my metro cards...even in my dreams.

this is going to sound very incoherent because i just woke up and i'm actually typing with my eyes closed because the screen is so bright. but i had another one of those 'wtf!' dreams with people who i haven't talked to in quite some time. or at all.

so, i'm attending some conference in dc. i'm on the metro with some other conference-goers, and i'm trying to get back to columbia heights. i'm looking out the window and talking out the time, but unbeknown to me, the columbia heights stop is all of a sudden above ground and i don't recognize it. instead, i end up taking the same train for about 3 hours, and end up in montmartre (!!!). it's beautiful. like something straight out of a movie...but the city looks like it just passed industrial age...everything looks so steampunk. the eiffel tower is in the background, and there are so many bridges (a la amsterdam)...and even the sun is setting. and i swear to you, there are newspaper boys wearing berets.

i haven't gotten off the metro yet, but it seems like montmartre runs forever. i find one of my conference goer friends on the train. and he is actually someone i met at a conference in honolulu and with whom i wish i had actually exchanged contact info. (real life note: all i remember about him is he worked in cleveland...i think as some kind of academic counselor. and he had his layover in denver. and he had glasses. he was pretty nice though. and i had all these work related questions for him...anyyyyyways.) but there he is, he tells me that i can just get off at the next station and take the train back to dc, and i kinda get pissed because obviously, that would have crossed my mind...undoing the last action and all. i say goodbye to montmartre, get off the train to get on the platform to get back to columbia heights. by myself.

only, as soon as i get off, i scream 'waait!!!' and i see the honolulu-conference-dude look sadly back at me from the last metro window. in my haste, i had forgotten my stupid metro card on my seat. i stand on the platform, shuffling through my cards: driver's license, student ID, and insurance card. no sign of my credit card in my wallet...but in an extra dose of reality, i reach into my jeans pocket and there it is...enveloped with a michaels' crushed coupon shield for 40% off of any regular item. i quickly buy a new smart trip, which looks like a regular metro ticket...well regular, plus the alterations bryan used to make to them. and i get on the train and fall asleep.

and end up. in. hawaii. so i wake up and am so confused on how i even get from france to hawaii, but it's no big deal. the train is passing over rickety bridges with skeletons scattered in the tropical waters, and with my 'well, i guess i'm asian, i can answer' omniscience, i start answering metro riders' questions about why there are dead bodies in the shallow pools. i tell them that these are no ordinary bodies..these are tainted bodies. and you can't go outside after a certain time around this part of hawaii. if you touch them, they'll remember (through osmosis, of course) what it was like to be human and envy you for it...envy you for your memories. and they'll find you. and this is why no one wanted to touch them. they are in awe. and very scared. the sun has almost set, and this is when zombie/skeleton armies wake up and try and remember.

then, i realize, i have nowhere to stay. i get off at the next stop, which seems to be slightly touristy, and stay at the nearest inn, which thankfully and predictably has a gift shop. the inn locks and puts up bars on their windows (i help a little), and i wander into the gift shop, which is about the size of my room. the shop/inn ladies are very friendly and laugh when they see me dropping 2 lb bags of macadamia nuts into a basket. 'it's 7 dollars for a sixteenth of this back home,' i say. they ask about dc and what other prices are around there. we're having a pretty long conversation, and i haven't stopped piling 2 lbers into my basket. then, in a stroke of weird, one of the shopkeepers who is stocking more macadamia nuts and chocolates on the shelves asks me about my dad and how the family is. i don't recognize the woman but she asks all about our family. i update her...with real information. my dad recently was reunited with his sister...whom he hadn't seen in 20 years. jeanie is married now and lives in dallas. etc. etc. it was just very strange that i was giving this woman all this information and didn't recognize her.

well, until she turned around. not completely....just enough so see a partial profile. it was my father's mom. whom i had never met before she passed away when i was little. whose voice and hands, i obviously wouldn't remember. but i never acknowledged that in my dream. i just smiled. she never aged from my mental picture of her. she was in her 40s, with a bun in her hair. she has very smooth hands...unlike most old folks. she is very kind, and i don't mind filling her in on what everyone has been up to. it's very strange. i feel like i should feel weird about this part, but i don't.

i and told the shopkeepers i would need to buy a plane ticket back to dc. and i fretted about how the hell i was going to stay asleep on the plane since i forgot my ipod. after purchasing bags of coconuts, i went back to my hotel room and snuggled in my bed to sleep. and when i finally dozed off, i woke up.

and wanted to type this all out before i forgot. so, here i am.

weird, eh?

another sticky rice dream

i'm living in some suburban neighborhood, where there's a huge autumn fair that takes place. i have this delicious recipe for apple pies, but this woman takes my moleskine and tries to make sense of my scrawl so she can take the prize for blue ribbon apple pies (i know, this is already really creepy!) so this woman. is my fucking neighbor. in an ellipse shaped court. so i go next door. this lady is blonde, wearing an apron and has a dozen pies settled on this long dining room table. i snatch my moleskine from her table. she sees me and starts chasing after me with a rolling pin. the rest of my dream involves me running from this crazy bitch...climbing up houses....sidling porches...jumping into recently purchased home depot shrubs. then, i can hear her. i've almost made it back to my house (i don't know why i just didn't hope over my own fence), but she's right behind me.

so what do i do?

i jump on a slide that dumps into a pool.

full of boys.

hot, sexy, young boys.

totally hot, sexy, young, LEGALLY AGED boys.

they're kind of like 'what, what, what's this hottie doing here' and although i want to stay and chat and possibly get on the up and up with one of these gentleman...i run back to my house to jump in bed to hide from the apple pie baker.

the end.


best dreams ever.

evidence i need to stop eating sticky rice before i go to sleep

i'm half awake right now. surely, also somewhat intoxicated. and i've just woken up from the most bizarre, creepy dream i've had....in a couple days. for the most part, in this dream sequence, i was hanging out with my family. not doing much. then, the craziness ensues when in the middle of the night, i follow my cousin up the eiffel tower. she's sleepwalking or something. it's a nice night. a little breezy. i notice that there are no gates or fences or anything people walking off the side...but not until it's too late. my cousin makes a misstep...hovers for a second...looks at me...and starts falling. i can't grab her because she seriously walks about 10 feet into nowhere before she starts plummeting to her death. and the look on her face. i take the elevator all of the way down, but by the time i get there...i can see body pieces everywhere and blood is dripping from every part of the eiffel tower. and it's getting on my hoodie.

so i run inside the hotel. very careful not to look or step on my cousin's parts (which are MANY). throw my hoodie in the laundry. and pretend i'm asleep!

wth.

that is when i woke up, ironically enough. i feel so weird now. of course, i can't tell my cousin because she a) is still in middle school and b) would probably cry for days and c) would tell her parents who would tell my parents who would call me up no matter where i was and yell at me.

analyze that!